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Rape Dreams: Interpret the Meaning and Message

deram school dream interpertation

Some of the most powerful and traumatizing dreams involve rape. In some cases the dreamers have experienced rape or sexual assault, and when they dream about it they are trying to reprocess the memories for healing. But usually rape in dreams has a non-sexual meaning. Think of uses in everyday conversation when it means one side dominates another in sports or video games. The player or team that’s dominated is said to be “raped,” especially when the loss is humiliating. Rape can also mean to exploit innocence, beauty, and natural resources. It’s a violation. It’s used as an expression of helplessness and anger and power. Dreams can use scenarios involving rape as a metaphorical means to express dynamics of a situation or feelings.

Think of it from the perspective of the dreaming mind that wants to tell a story. It creates symbolic meaning by making comparisons and using one definition of a word to mean another. People do it too, as illustrated above. Thought of this way, rape in a dream is simply an effective way to tell the story. Dreams enact alternate definitions of the word rape, turning them into scenarios of sexual rape.

Dreams are rarely literal. Always think of them first as figurative.

Symbolism of rape in a dream = coercion

Another way dreams use rape figuratively is to express the feeling of being forced to do something you don’t want to do, or to be someone you don’t want be. It’s a theme found frequently in the dreams of people who resist living up to cultural ideals and expectations of their gender, then face the consequences. Some females resent feeling like they have to wear makeup and heels just because it’s expected. Some males don’t want to act tough and distant or spend hours in the gym buffing up just so they can be viewed as “real men.” The pressure to live up to gender ideals feels coercive to them.

Social pressure to live up to gender ideals can be intense, and the consequences of defying it extreme. Even when a person tries to live up to gender ideals it can still feel like coercion. It’s not necessarily “consensual.”

Two lessons can be especially helpful when interpreting dreams about rape:

  • Dreams exaggerate to create symbolism and be memorable.
  • Dreams amplify to express your feelings and bring forward what you might otherwise overlook or minimize.

The dreaming mind does not care that rape is a delicate topic. It uses the most effective means to tell the story and accomplish the objectives that underlie it.

For people who have been raped, a mess of personal associations come into play that their dreams can use to create symbolism, express emotions, and address dynamics. For survivors of rape, the best approach to dreams about being raped is found in my lesson on nightmares. We’ll talk more about this subject later. However, it doesn’t mean their dreams can’t use rape symbolically or metaphorically.

Gang rape in dreams

Rape symbolism arises in dreams about being raped by a group of men, and whether a male or female has such a dream the basic meaning can be “men in general.” Being male in some cultures feels coercive and violating to some men. Trying to fit in as “one of the men” forces some men to try to be something they aren’t.

For example, a man I spoke with at Reddit Dreams asked why he has recurring dreams about being raped by other men. It connects with hiding his homosexuality. He forces himself to act straight. Rape sums up how he feels coerced.

Imagine the male whose father berates him to “be a man why don’t ya” and attacks him psychologically. Imagine being called “sissy” and “fag” by a bully. This sort of situation is readily turned into dreams about being raped by a single man, not a group, if the source of the coercion and humiliation is singular. And don’t expect the dream character to necessarily look like the dreamer’s tormentor. Dreams often use surrogates and symbols.

Females dream of gang rape for some of the same reasons. When males fire words at them them such as “ugly” and “bitch” it can wound them deeply. They can feel like all men view them that way, and all men are bad or predatory. Rape in their dreams expresses their humiliation and fear. When the wounding comes from other females, they can dream about it as being raped by a group of females.

Gang rape in a dream can be an exaggerated way of expressing the idea of being ganged-up on. It can express the feeling that everyone is out to get you.

Rape dream: a graphic representation of your inner life

Rape can be a graphic representation of inner life. For example, rape can be a symbolic way of showing how you act toward yourself when you talk with yourself harshly or feel ashamed of who you are. Or your ego is coercive, threatening, takes what it wants. If that’s how life is in your head, it’s likely to show in your dreams.

Some people are best described as rapists just based on their personality and character. If a dream shows you as a rapist, it might be true in a sense. But you MUST keep in mind the symbolic ideas that can be expressed as rape. For example, being depicted in a dream as a rapist can be a way of symbolically comparing with personality traits such as obsession, taking advantage of weakness or innocence, or single-minded determination to take what you want.

Carl Jung says some dreams are objective; they tell it like it is, but most dreams are subjective; they tell it like you see it. This teaching is tremendously important to bring with you as you interpret dreams involving rape or portrayals of rapists. I recently encountered a post at Reddit where a young woman reported a dream of being raped by her father. She says he acts strangely toward her and gives her a weird vibe. Is her dream subjectively expressing that feeling and exaggerating it into a story about rape? She didn’t answer. It’s hard to talk about.

Most people don’t know that dreams use symbolism. This is simple fact #3 about dreams that I teach in my Crash Course in Dream Interpretation:


Rape dreams: a warning about living dangerously

A dream about rape might connect with a recent or ongoing situation that’s dangerous, or potentially so, sexually or otherwise. It’s the sort of comparison dreams are known to make because dangerous situations such as passing out at a party or running off with people you don’t know can lead to rape. In which case, dreaming about rape amplifies the message about putting yourself in danger.

A rape dream can come in response to feeling vulnerable. For example, after being hit on at a gas station by a creepy guy, a woman dreams that night about being raped at that gas station by a similar guy. It’s an expression of having her dignity attacked, compounded by recognizing her vulnerability to men who are stronger than her.

Dreams can act as simulations, and a dream about rape can be a way of acting out an issue related to it. For example, you hear a graphic story about a friend who is raped then dream it happens to you. It’s a way of really understanding what that friend went through, or to express fear of it happening to you. Or you have a rape fantasy and dream about rape. Something about the idea of domination and humiliation turns you on.

For example, a young man with a rape fantasy had two dreams that when looked at together present a choice. In one, he has normal sex with a girl he is attracted to, an imaginary character, and in the other he rapes a random girl. The dreams are showing him his choices. On the one hand, sex with someone he’s attracted to (normal sex) appeals to him but lacks the stimulation he feels at the thought of raping someone. The rape dream shows that the stimulation of rape comes at the expense any sort of intimacy. He can have one or the other but not both.

Rape dreams for survivors

dream about rape

Rape in a dream can have sexual roots. People who have been raped are likely to dream about it. It seems cruel to replay traumatizing events, but it actually helps by creating psychological cushion between the present moment in time and what happened in the past. Once the dream is over it’s in the past, and when something can be thought of as in the past it creates personal distance, or cushion. The same sort of process happens with other traumas such as combat and abuse.

On the other hand, rape dreams can show that you’re still chained psychologically, emotionally and even physically to the experience. For example, a woman dreams about finding her rapist working beneath a car. She coldly pulls out a gun and pumps rounds into him. The dream is an expression of her thoughts of revenge. She didn’t report the rape because her best friend’s brother did it, and it’s eating her up inside. Her thoughts of revenge rip open the scab and keep the wound fresh.

Rape in dreams can be used to exaggerate a situation related to sexual tension or exploitation, such as when a person is used as a sexual plaything. When you are used for sex or harassed sexually, your dreams can tell it like it is. It’s as if you are raped, even though you don’t explicitly say no. Hundreds of women (and maybe some men too) who encountered Harvey Weinstein, Bill Cosby, and Ghislaine Maxwell know exactly what I mean.


Resources to help with rape dreams

If you have found this post because you were raped, dream about it, and want help, try dream rescripting, used in therapeutic settings for treatment of chronic nightmares and PTSD. Use this link when you’re ready to get to work: Dream rescripting worksheet.

Another rescripting worksheet.

Links can be broken so if the ones above don’t work for you, simply search online for “dream rescripting worksheet.” Deep inner healing work like this is best done with a therapist.

You deserve to have your life back. Your dreams are trying to help you heal. Dr. Carl Jung said dreams are only for your benefit, even when they are dark and fearsome.

I also suggest Peter LeVine‘s book “Waking the Tiger.” Its insights and exercises can help you feel safe and in control of your body again.

This post covers the symbolic meaning of rape dreams and offers advice for understanding them and healing from past sexual-related trauma.

Namaste.

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DreamSchool.net: courses in dream interpretation

52 thoughts on “Rape Dreams: Interpret the Meaning and Message”

  1. i had a dream where jesus retuned to earth and left me behind and demons came to my house and took turns raping me it was very scary and painful then i woke up

  2. Hi i had a dream that i was in a car with three guys that knew and they planned to rape me. in my dream it was dark and i knew what they were going to do so i told them that they were attractive and that i knew what they wanted. they then decided that they would do it individually and pulled over into a subdivision but before they could a girl roller-skated by and i told them that we should go somewhere else. they said no and as they were about to rape me someone came up and had a conversation with the driver. we all left and they took me back to my house and i grabbed clothes and put them in a bag to leave with them. my mom then calls me on one of the guys’ phones and asks me where i am because i left the house at night and it was now day. i told her with some friends and then she yells at me for lying and pulls into the house and yells at me while ignoring the guys who are around me. and then i wanted to leave with them but then i woke up. can you help me with what it means it scared me when i woke up. I am soon to be sixteen in the dream too.

    1. The change from night to day in the dream gives me the idea that something is coming to light or something new is emerging in you. You react to the opening scene with clever thinking and the way a mature person would try to make the best of a bad situation. It seems that you are learning to think for yourself, but somehow the influence of your mom and perhaps your childhood too are trying to pull you back into an old way of thinking. That’s what the dream means by wanting to leave home — you are looking to leave that sphere of influence.

  3. Hey, first of all this is a great post! But I really feel that the image needs to be removed. It is a huge potential vidual trigger for trauma and PTSD on a post where survivors are more likely to find themselves. I found it really upsetting and I haven’t even been raped in real life – I’ve ‘only’ been sexually assaulted.

  4. hi there I had this dream that during my break at work I went out to a car with 2 of my coworkers and for some reason I was cleaning out my coworkers car, then a man approached me and said that my car was so nice then came really close to me as I had the backseat open cleaning then continued to say something about 60% and grabbed me and started kissing me and I was trying to pull me away but then shoved me in the back seat of the car with him and when I went looking for my coworkers, they were gone. I immediately woke you crying after that. what does this mean?

    1. A person’s car can symbolize their life, specifically their public life and what makes them “go” in the figurative sense. So with that in mind, what does it mean to clean you coworker’s car? It can mean you feel like you are cleaning up the person’s mess. I can picture this person sweet talking you into doing something at work that benefits him, then leaving you to do the work (that’s why the dream shows your coworkers disappearing). That’s how I translate the symbolism of the dream, but only you know what it really means.

  5. Hello……someone dreamed of me being almost raped by a gang in a certain house.
    She narrates I was led by a friend but the friend left me inside the house where I was raped.

    Kindly help to understand….is a warning against bad life or what?

    1. When a friend dreams about you it’s subjectively, from their point of view and based on their thoughts, feelings, and perceptions. But usually, dream characters are entirely personal for the dreamer, so when people dream about you, they are really dreaming about themselves. If you have been putting yourself in jeopardy by walking into dangerous situations, it’s possible that the person who dreamed about you being raped is really dreaming about you, but it’s not a prophecy. The dream is simply a scenario created to say “she puts herself in danger,” or “the friend in the dream is someone who can’t be trusted.” But remember, it’s subjective. It’s up to you to decide whether there’s a message for you.

  6. Hi, I’m 28 and I keep having dreams where my ex boyfriend is raping me. Most the time it starts with him trying to get back with me but I really don’t want to. However when he advances on me, I physically enjoy it at first but I keep saying no and when he doesn’t stop it starts to feel bad and like actual rape. This time in my dream, I was at a psychiatric facility and he came to my room and raped me. He said it was his right and shit like that. Then later I was at his family’s place and I confessed to his mother who was really disgusted by him and sad for me.

    I used to think it was a way of me getting over the fact that he had emotionally manipulated me to sex during our relationship but it’s been two years now and I’d like to think I’m over it. I’m also in a new relationship so this freaked me out

    1. The new relationship could be bringing up fears based on the old one. People tend to repeat patterns in relationships, and whether or not your new guy is at all like the old guy, you might still be wondering if he’s going to show a darker face down the road once your hooked into the relationship. You might also be seeing the same vulnerabilities in yourself now as you had then. There might be something in you that’s unresolved, a wound that hasn’t healed, a loss of respect for yourself or feeling of disgust, a loss of personal dignity. I suggest that you look closely at your feelings. It’s no coincidence that the dreams are happening now that you’re in a new relationship.

  7. I have been having a reoccurring dream that has found me troubled and ashamed and wondering if I could get some help with it. The dream is very gruesome and violent. In the dream I am female (which is my gender) and I am violently attacking a younger female to near death and then I start taking advantage of her. It doesnt show me penetrating but its implied. Like I said, it’s very gruesome. I’m bashing the victims head as I’m in the act. And I wake to it being sexually arousing. (Wet dream) I’m married and straight and not an aggressive person during the day. No new meds. No traumas. Pretty happy go lucky person. But now I feel something is wrong with me. Please help.

    1. Hi Crystal, the dream is a shocker and it could be disturbing if you don’t know it’s symbolic. Interpreting a dream requires translating the symbolism. Let’s break it down.

      It’s a recurring dream and that type of dream can mean you are having a recurring theme in your life.
      Another clue is found in the younger age of the dream character. Since most of your dream characters represent something about you, you ask if the dream is an expression of conflict with a younger part of yourself. And since the symbolism is strong, I’d guess there are some strong feelings behind the inner conflict if that’s the case.

      By torturing this character are you enacting the way you treat or talk to yourself? It’s exaggerated and dramatized the way it plays out in the dream but it could be true in a way. Dreams dramatize to bring things to our attention, and there might be a way you are doing yourself more damage than you know.

      It could also be an expression of shame. Can you think anything you’re ashamed about related to being that age, especially shame related to something sexual?

      Be assured by what Dr. Carl Jung says: dreams are always to be taken figuratively, not literally. There might be something in you that needs healing or self-expression, but there’s nothing wrong with you.

  8. Hello I recently had a dream of rape I was hired w/a company who required everyone hired to live at the facility I remember a bunch of women who were also hired unpacking clothes. The people in charge were all men for some reason. They all started to rape the women around me. I fought back by using objects to hurt them I even ran over a guy with a car. I ended up finding a women who worked closely at a store who I tried to get help from and just when I thought she was going to help me get away. She realized I was the one who ran over her brother so she chose not to help then I woke up.I was so angry to know that when it comes to rape woman can be made to feel powerless. I wanted revenge on every man I seen the next day. Do you know what that can possibly mean?

    1. The question to ask yourself is where in your life do you feel outrage about the way you and other women are treated. Look for ways that you feel powerless. The dream brings out some strong emotions and I think if you get to the bottom of them you’ll also get to the bottom of the dream’s meaning and message.
      Thank you for sharing your dream.

  9. I just recently had this dream.. That I myself (A soon to be Sixteen year old) was sexually abused and then raped.. I tryed to tell my best friend (Who’s a bit younger by a few months I believe.) That I was raped. He on the other hand (Who cares about me so much he calls me Wolfie.) Wanted to find out the story behind it. So i told him ti judt forget about it, but he didn’t. He kept on asking me and so I told him. I have had similar dreams on where I’d see my previous life.. I know it sounds strange.. But I have! Most of the times I think to myself “Why did this happen to me?” Or.. “How come I was mistaken as a target?” I still do wonder on why I was the target. I do see are a few images of my killer but can never figure out who it is.. I know I may sound crazy even for a fifthteen year old.. But, I feel like all of this leads up to something.. Just one big story line, I haven’t figured out yet..

    1. After many years of observation I can say I know dreams can show scenes from past lives, but it’s important to first look for their relevance to THIS life and what’s happening now. You know from reading my article about dreaming of rape that it can be symbolic. In your case, look first at the simple idea that you want to share your closest and most personal wounds and let the people closest to you know how you feel. But it takes persistence for you to open up. Think of a past life as possibly meaning a past time of this life and the crime committed against you as symbolism for how you feel about what’s happened.

      It does all lead up to something. You might have a revelation about memories hidden and feelings that are buried. You will have more dreams that continue this story, and they will respond to development in your waking life. The wounding experience is a universal experience that opens us to finding the Light within us. Without the cracks in our exterior we can’t see the light that’s behind what seems to be darkness and pain and the inborn ability to heal it. Creative expression of your feelings will help this process unfold. You choose the creative outlet and let these feelings out!

  10. I had a dream that I was making a purchase (the same purchase that my wife had okayed that same day in reality). The man who had assisted me in reality was assisting me in the dream and said he’d give me the item but that he’d get to have sex with my wife. Later in the dream it is dark and my wife and I are in bed. She is asleep. I wake to find a man on top of her attempting to rape her. I can’t see the man but it feels like he was the shop assistant. I’m not sure whether he had penetrated her or not, but I yell at him to get off her and am trying to pull him away but am having trouble fighting him. I see another figure standing in my peripheral that I can make out and I don’t know if it’s another person or if my wife was able to get away. This is when I woke up.
    I’ve tried to research, but havent had any luck decoding this one.

    1. You are unlikely to find much help online with a dream like this because it’s so personal and symbolic. Since it involves the event in your life from the previous day, it’s a safe bet to say it’s connected. Think about everything you thought and felt related to your interaction with the guy and look for anything related to the idea of something that comes between you and your wife. Is there something you were trying to fight off in the personal sense?

  11. hey my name is hellen,last night i had a dream about being raped,in the dream my friend was with me soundly asleep ,,i had some people on the door ,and i went to check who it was,,just then ten men come in and raped me,they wanted to rape my friend also but i pleaded with them to leave her alone,later after they are gone,all i want to do is kill my self for the pain is unbearable,kindly what could be the meaning of my dream? it occured at 3:40 am at night .

    1. Hi Hellen, you know from reading my lesson on dreams about rape that they’re understood as symbolic stories. In your dream, notice how the story uses ten men as the rapists. That can symbolize the idea of “men in general,” and rape is an exaggerated way of expressing how it feels for you to be subjected to something by men in general, or by certain kinds of men. An unwanted sexual come-on, for example, could be dreamed about as a group of men doing something to you, because its behavior men are known for.

      The story continues and you protect the friend from being raped in the dream. Thought of as a symbol, the friend could symbolize something about yourself you want to save from being profaned or degraded. Is there a bad compromise you’ve had to make with yourself in order to ‘survive’ where you are? Explore how you feel violated and it could lead you to the source of the dream. Thank you for sharing your dream with me.

  12. What does rape mean to me? [ Being used, breaking someone, someone that yhu care about hurting yhu, always thinking the worst of all men.]

    I had a dream that 2 black men wearing no shirt, they had abs, they had saggy pants and a hat turned backward, one had a green belt and the other red. The one with a green belt was carrying a gun and I was walking down a street alone. I saw the man with a pistol, and I started to turn around and run. That’s when I felt the men coming after me, I stopped because I feared for my life that they were going to kill me. I stopped and they grabbed me and the man yelled at me to lay down in the ditch. I layed on my stomach and I felt him get on top of me. The other man said stay still and it will be over soon we won’t hurt you. I remember begging god for help over and over again then I awoke. I’m a Christian and I believe highly in god. I have bisexual thoughts but I won’t call myself bisexual because I believe that it’s a sin. But the night before I went to sleep I saw a video where a man raped a woman. I never watched it but I read the title. I am in a relationship with a black man who is a rapper. Sometimes when we are together I feel like I sexually please him and leave unsatisfied. I am in love with him and I always believe men will cheat on me with other woman. My dad died when I was young and he used to sexually harassed me. I never told anyone because I loved him and didn’t want to get him in trouble. When he died I felt a sense of relief please help me understand better why I have dreamed this last night. My family doesn’t approve of black men as well me being white they believe I should date my own race or kind. I act ghetto and I have the mindset of a hood girl being the way I grew up. I feel forced Andy obligated to what society thinks resepctable white women should act. I’m hiding from the Man I love my age because I don’t want him to treat me deifferent HELP PLEASE!!!

    1. Hey, I wish I would have seen your comment earlier so I could have responded sooner. The key to the dream could be the belts worn by the men. One is green and green can mean “go.” The other is red and red can mean “stop.” Now look at that in terms of your conflict about being white and dating a black man. You are in conflict because your family doesn’t approve — a way of saying “stop.” But you want to be loved and do it anyway, so you “go.” Ask yourself, how do you feel forced in this situation? Obviously, there’s your family’s pressure and that’s a sort of force. There’s pressure from society that makes you feel forced. I think that’s the conflict expressed in your dream as rape. But there could be more that’s forcing you to do things that compromise your dignity and make you seek out situations that replay your traumas. I’ll get to that in a moment.

      Notice that you are raped in a ditch. That could be a way of saying that you feel low and something about this whole situation really has you down. “Low” and “down” are words associated with ditches. Also, with rape, the raper (rapper?) gets the pleasure and the person raped is just used for gratification. I think you’d be wise to really ask yourself if you feel like you are being used in this relationship. You are not sexually satisfied, right? You have a history of being used sexually and toyed with, and because of what happened with your father, you might have a pattern of seeking out the wrong men. I can’t say for sure, but it’s natural to find people that remind us of our past and replay our traumas. Once you resolve the past, you can break the pattern.

      You have a right to make your own decisions, and this whole notion of “you must date your own race or kind” is just nonsense. People believe it though and I bet you feel a lot of pressure. Also, you are having to hide a lot about yourself and that’s just a bad situation to be in. You need to be able to live openly and free. I can’t tell you how to resolve the situation, but I can say that you will probably not be happy until you can be true to yourself and always do the right thing. Take care and God be with you.

  13. I had a dream once that my own bed raped me. That was the first time I’ve had an inanimate object in my dream rape me. In most dreams I have that involve sexual content, it is usually rape. I have never been raped or assaulted at all. I have never really had any sexual experiences. Is this just anxiety about sex in general?

    1. Since you are in bed as you dream and your sexual dreams are usually about rape, I can see how there could be a connection. I suggest that you try to change this narrative. You don’t have much sexual experience but you know what it can be like ideally. You have sex with someone you love and who loves you. It’s tender, giving, and very very pleasurable. Try daydreaming the perfect scenario and really feel it. It might help your dreams to change to become more pleasurable when they involve sex. You have a right to enjoy it!

  14. Varaidzo Sally Chitimira

    Yesterday I traveled quite tumultuously to an event and would have gone to a friend’s concert afterwards.

    Then my mom had a dream that I got raped at the concert then I came home and showered it off. What do you think this means

    1. The first possibility to consider is your mom worries about you and has that “mom sense” for when you could be putting yourself in jeopardy.

  15. I have been having recurring dreams about two random men raping me. I don’t know what to do. Sometimes I have to walk home alone after school or in the dark and then left at home all alone. I always feel like these two men will just pop out of nowhere and rape me or force me to do something I don’t want. In one if my dreams they actually about killed me by hitting me with a crowbar. I am so scared and don’t know what to do.

    1. First, the dream is unlikely to be showing you a future happening, though dreams are known to foreshow possibilities. It’s always wise to remember a dream that impacts you and keep your eyes open. However, dreams are also known for rehearing threat simulations. You walk home alone and I bet the thought has crossed your mind, hey, what if someone jumps out and assaults me? So your dreams pick up on those thoughts and make it happen in a sense, so you will think through what to do in the unlikely event that the threat comes true.

      That means, think it through. Know what to do before it happens — if it happens. This applies also to possible threats such as a fire starts in your house or something like that.

      Something for you to consider is the dreams could be showing you how you feel about conforming to the expectations that males have of females. As a female you are expected to behave, dress and look certain ways to live up to the ideals set by society. There’s the expectation “that’s what men want so that’s what I have to do.” Maybe you feel deeply used and violated by those expectations. I’ve seen it previously in women’s rape dreams. Consider that possibility for the meaning of the dream.

      1. Thank you. . I never think about dressing nice though. . I honestly hate nice clothes. I always wear a T-Shirt with leggings or sweatpants or maybe jeans, but I’m not really known to dress nice. I know 6 people who like me but I never really know if it is how I dress or if it’s my humor or if they want me to dress nicer but that will never happen so people will have to deal with that. So your saying I shouldn’t change who I am, right?

        1. Appearance is part of the equation, but there are deeper issues to consider. I don’t know what you need to change about yourself, if anything. The real issue is, do you feel forced, compelled, or violated in some way? Rape in dreams is usually some sort of symbolism related to those ideas. Your job is to find out how the scenario of rape in your dream reflects what you feel and perceive.

  16. I had this dream last night, more like a nightmare, I couldn’t fall back asleep after, every time I closed my eyes the dream started again. I am in a room hiding under a bed asking if he was done yet, would he please just leave. I am put on the bed and raped. (In the dream I knew the person but it was no-one that I recognized). I see him walk down the steps and my boyfriend is laying on the couch. He then starts talking to some other unknown person stating he wishes he would have just walked in on me cheating on him. I ran down the steps to tell him I was raped and he doesn’t believe me.

    It hurt my chest in real life when I woke up, the feeling was very strange. Thoughts?

    1. Begin with the basic idea that you perceive that your boyfriend doesn’t believe you about something important and you feel violated because of it. I always look for a simple idea or premise in a dream and start the interpretation there. In your dream, you hide under the bed. Is there something about yourself you’re hiding? Does something in you feel vulnerable or violated? Notice that the rapist moves from the bedroom to where your boyfriend is. Now think of them as characters in a story and the action connects them together symbolically. My guess is, there’s something deep inside you that you need your boyfriend to see and recognize, but he won’t do it, and it makes you feel violated. Rape is a violation. Your boyfriend isn’t the ultimate source of the thing in you that makes you want to hide yourself — he’s not shown as the rapist in the dream — but in some way it appears that he doesn’t care enough to find out what’s really going on inside you and why you feel the way you do.

      I have to emphasize that this is how I see it from my viewpoint, judging only by how you describe the dream.

  17. I had a lucid dream yesterday where I ‘avoided’ attempted rape.

    The ‘dream’ starts with me walking with a group of girls I don’t even know. We stopped in front of a very small, secluded Japanese geisha house. The background of the dream was empty with only a light gray floor and a darkish gray wall that both don’t end. I looked inside the house to see a few people laying down on beige or bamboo mats(?). I turned behind me to my left to see a sign saying to wear little to no underwear when I go inside to lay down. I instantly didn’t like the idea come here. I turned to the group of girls to only find that they disappeared. An old, bald Japanese man peeked out from behind the entranceway. He asked me if I was going to go inside. I instantly said nevermind. He looked at me very angry as his pupils shrunk.”YOU CAN’T SAY NEVERMIND,” he said loudly. I stepped back a couple of feet when I saw his reaction. I said nevermind again without thinking which made him repeat his statement, but music started playing afterwards. It was suspenseful and chase-like. I knew I had to run, but I couldn’t turn around when I tried to. I felt like I lost control of the dream, so I decided to forced myself awake before anything could happen. Even when I woke up I heard the music for a few more seconds before I was fully awake.

    I think my dream was inspired by anime after thinking of ways interactions in life effect dreams. I felt like a anime girl in the situation but not as ingorant. The dream showed me the scary side I knew about but never ‘literally’ wanted from thoses anime.

    1. My suggestion is to think in terms of using your own power and insight. You sensed that the situation wasn’t right when you looked into the geisha house, and rather than be coerced, you asserted yourself. If the dream is a simulation based on the scenarios you’ve seen in anime, what did you learn about yourself through your actions and reactions? What I see is, you have strength to protect yourself and resist coercion.

  18. I had a confusing dream of me halucinating because of the lack of sleep i had, seeing my boyfriend and bringing him to my house and we ended up having sex. The guy I had sex with ended up going to the bathroom and when he came back it wasn’t my boyfriend and I found out that I was drugged and basically raped by him.

    1. One way of looking at it is that lack of sleep is affecting your judgement and could potentially lead to a dangerous situation. Another way of looking at it is sometimes you feel like there’s another side to your boyfriend you don’t know. It could show that your perception of him changes depending on the circumstances. Do you find yourself looking at him sometimes and wondering who he really is and what he’s really about?

  19. Hi i just woke up from a dream about being raped by three men i remember telling them to stop and i was tryna block my bedroom door but they were to stong to stop they grabbed a hold of me removed all my cloth and took turns raping me i remember fighting back and trying to break free i was also already pregnant in my dream as im also pregnant in real life i remember seeing my partner there and telling me its gonna be okay just relax what does this mean …

    1. I can’t tell you what it means, but I can offer a suggestion. Since you know you are pregnant in the dream and your partner is there, my guess is the rape symbolizes something related to the pregnancy. I’m male so I don’t know what it’s like to be pregnant, but I’ve been told that an issue for some pregnant women is the sense of loss of control of their body. If you view rape symbolically as loss of control of your body, and pregnancy as the result of sex, you have a basis for the symbolism of your dream. Again though, I can’t say for sure.

      In that light, look at your struggle to break free and your partner’s advice to relax, everything’s going to be OK. To me, that looks like it could show a struggle within you to be free of the pregnancy, and your partner’s advice is what you need to know to get through this difficult period.

      By the way, do you know that your baby shares your dreams? Don’t worry — the baby knows only peace and love so your dreams about struggle are not going to affect it negatively. But I tell you this to plant the idea that the changes you’re experiencing are worth it. Hang in there. You’re going to be all right.

  20. Emma - I'm completely terrified -

    okay this is probably a little crazy, my girlfriend and I keep having this reoccurring dream of me being raped by my ex-boyfriend and it’s kind of freaking me out I have probably had it for the last four five nights in a row. And I’m not entirely sure what to think of it.

    Basically what happens is she and I are on a date of some sort and out of nowhere we were somewhat ‘ kidnapped ‘ and were driven to this place after she is not out cold and I’m take into a separate room and shes thrown into a cellar of some sort. And I’m tied to this bed, I think I was blindfolded but not until after I saw the face of my ex-boyfriend and I watched him tear off my clothes, and then he forced himself onto me and i tried to scream but he forced his hand over my mouth so I looked away and immediately saw my girlfriend she was tied to a chair being forced to watch the entire thing.
    and then the entire thing flips to kind of happy i end up pregnant and my girlfriend and i keep it and name it angelica hope in orderto remind us of the hope throughout the dark times
    but the fact that it’s reoccurring is freaking me out I don’t know to think of it.

    1. Dreams tell stories using symbolism, so begin by understanding that rape in your dream is symbolism for something. For what? It’s defined by the story. In the end you end up pregnant and happy. You have a baby and name it (ANGEL-ica?). So view this dream-story in light of that fact.

      Now look at how the story opens. You’re on a date with your girlfriend and you’re kidnapped. Think of kidnapped in the sense of something is done involuntarily. That idea can be used by dreams widely. In your case, take the example of, you date a guy because you’re a girl and you think that’s what you’re supposed to do, but you know you’re really attracted to other females. You involuntarily dated males. That’s just an example.

      Now consider that the rape happens while your girlfriend watches. That can mean “she’s witness to something that harmed me or hurt me.” I’m picturing you telling her about what a jerk your ex was, assuming that’s the case. Just use it as an example. Imagine how telling her about something bad related to that relationship and what it did to you is like her being forced to watch something that hurt you. That’s what the dream could mean in that scene — something like that.

      But you gained something from the experience that’s positive and you can share it with your girlfriend. Somehow it’s related to keeping hope through the dark times. I can’t say for sure what it is, but hopefully my suggestions lead you onto the right path for understanding the dream.

      Recurring dreams are a great place to focus your interpretation efforts. They’re certainly meaningful. They can stem from recurring situations in your life, or they can be used as a repeating theme, like sequels to a movie. But in your case I think the reason could be that there’s an urgent message trying to get through to you from the dreams and that’s why they recur.

  21. I’m actually pretty young. I’m 13 currently and had this dream at 10 years old. I remember being in the bathroom at my Dad’s father’s house and he walked in, no pants or underwear and he was clearly aroused. I remember me being on the toilet seat and then he comes towards me and now this is all I remember since it happened over three years ago. Also, around the time I had the dream, I was visiting his house, but it wasn’t and irregular thing or new experience when I was going over there. I just recently told people about it because I’ve always felt like it was disgusting and my fault. I’ve had another dream about rape happening to me after this when I was 10, with my elementary school principal after I has been in trouble.

    1. Actions such as rape in a dream has to be viewed as symbolism, not as literal, so there’s no reason to be disgusted. The dream could show that your young mind is trying to understand adult themes. When I was ten I didn’t even know what “aroused” meant in the sexual sense. Since you were visiting your dad’s house at the time, perhaps the dream reflects a difficulty with handling him — men are different creatures than women. The dream with the principal could mean simply that you felt violated or punished.

  22. I took a nap at my university’s sleeping lounge today for 1 hour and a half. I regret it.

    I basically dreamed about being chased, by a woman around my age, black hair, white woman, thin but fast, wearing very little clothing in the WINTER, with just a t shirt and black leggings.
    I mean, I’m not any better, I was wearing nothing but a T-shirt. Anyway, I dreamed that she was chasing me for a hell of a long time, and we were coming from school so I missed my bus stop and stupidly tried to walk my way home… in nothing but a business shirt (long sleeved, buttoned up, long tails, for men, etc). It takes 1 full hour of bussing to go from my house to my university.
    It was night time, and we stopped for some food at a Chinese or Turkish place, I don’t remember, dingy and lowly lit place with one woman in it, and then when she FINALLY caught me as I was running across the street to the other side of the road, and then she raped me, with her fingers.

    Clearly, my subconscious isn’t very happy with who I befriend and where I take naps.

    If it helps, I have been friends with a girl this year that I feel uses me, she only asks for help with homework and editing essays and studying for exams. She is only stressed out when she’s with me and I have told her to her face that you are toxic girl, leave me alone
    Thankfully, we don’t hang out anymore
    I am a girl as well.
    If it helps, we are both African girls, so having a white woman rape me in my dream seems odd

    This is the second time I have dreamed about a white woman raping me, the first time being a shower stall, and after I resisted for a long time, I gave in. I hated it

    The funny thing is, I am a VERY passive person in real life (because I had a religious and conservative upbringning so I don’t make many choices in life for myself), and in dreams, I never take any action ever either.
    The only time I seemed to be an active particpant in my dreams ever were when I tried to run away from these two rape dreams. Now that I think about it, the woman fits the same description as the last rape dream. It’s the same woman raping me over and over again

    What does she want? If it helps, I’m a virgin who has never been in a relationship. God do I hate this. Thank you by the way.

    1. What a dream! It shows some powerful feelings are at the heart of it. Your association with the girl who used you for help with school is a big clue that the experience with her is part of the dream. She could represent the woman who rapes you — I see a secondary detail about being ill-prepared for the weather symbolizing being ill-prepared for school and how the experience with the girl could have impacted your preparation. It can be a visual metaphor for feeling exposed. But I think the symbolism could go deeper to express how you feel.

      Strong contrast in dreams is very telling of a strong personal dynamic at play in the dream. First, read this primer on use of comparison and contrast in dreams.

      You point out that the woman is white and you are black (or at least a shade of brown!). That contrast could be the dream’s way of saying that you see something in black n white, as either/or with no shades of grey. But we really have to look at the action of the dream. Rape could be a way of saying “I feel compromised personally.” I wonder if being a black girl in a white-dominated institution makes you feel compromised. You can’t really be yourself, or you feel an expectation to conform to that culture. Even in a “black” college you are still preparing to enter a workforce that’s mostly dominated by white culture.

      If the girl you helped in school is white, that fact could reinforce this idea. Look closely at why you helped her and if you felt obligated for some reason. Search your feelings. Do you feel compromised or taken advantage of? Do you feel like you have no choice?

      The fact that you dream recurrently about being raped by a woman shows that whatever situation is behind the dreams is ongoing. It’s not a one-time event.

      I hope my ideas help you understand the dream.

  23. Please please please help me as soon as possible.
    I always thought I was raped because I had sexual thoughts as a young child (6 to 8) and violent sexual thoughts. I always hated human contact and dreaded when people touched me. Specially when they (or even myself) touch my belly. I still do. Recently, I started having a dream where my uncle would put me to bed, hike up my skirt and kiss my private parts and belly. It seems like a memory. I wonder: am I making this up? How do I know? I’m afraid I’m lying and just making things up but it seems so real. I dissociate a lot now that I’m a young woman as well.

    1. Lola, I was out of town and am just getting around to answering comments here, sorry if to make you wait. Dreams can help you uncover repressed memories, and they can invent scenarios to help you understand how you feel. Were you molested, or do you feel that way? I’m from the school that says you need to recover memories of molestation in a straightforward way. A dream can be the catalyst, the opener of the floodgate, but you have to take it from there. You already know the answer deep inside. No doubt there are reasons why you react so strongly to human contact. It’s possible that the source is something else than molestation and your dreams created the scenario with your uncle as a way of expressing how you feel. Before going to bed, ask your dreams to clarify. And make absolutely sure you’re ready to know the truth. Your dreaming mind might hold back if it thinks the info would cause you serious harm.

  24. i afraid sometym from my dream its like be ghost or some timei feel in my surrounding last night my dream about some one raped me and the second day dream was some one molest me wht it mean i am soo tense

    1. First of all, it’s probably not a premonition. However, do consider the possibility that the dreams could be saying that you are vulnerable and should watch out for yourself better. I don’t know. It’s just a possibility.

      Otherwise, consider the symbolism of rape and molestation. It means “taken advantage of,” “overpowered,” “used,” “disrespected.” It means you feel unsafe. It could be a general feeling in you, or tied to a specific situation in your life. Ponder the dream. Ask yourself if you feel vulnerable. Ask if someone is taking advantage of you. The dreams are looking for you to respond. Acting in the face of fear is the definition of courage. Perhaps that’s the bottom line here. Can you respond to the dreams in a way that makes you feel safer?

As Dr. Frasier Crane says, I'm listening. Leave a comment.

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