Difference between precognitive and ordinary dreams
As a dreams expert who does a lot of media interviews, I am asked fairly often how to distinguish ordinary dreams from precognitive ones. In fact, I was recently asked that question on the Christine Upchurch Show. (I was her guest on Aug. 1, 2014 show. Scroll down to her archive).
Short answer: look for personal symbolism and rule out other possibilities.
First rule out that a dream you suspect to be precognitive is actually about something personal to you. The majority of dreams for most people are entirely personal. Ask yourself if the dream is residue from the previous day. Or does it express your anxieties or wishes. Physicist Russ Targ, who has studied precognition as a scientist and written extensively about it, uses this example: You know you haven’t studied for a test, you dream you fail it then really do fail it. That’s a self-fulfilling prophecy and not precognition.
While everyone has the ability to precognitive dream because it’s an innate ability, in my experience only a small subset of the population does it regularly and remember when they do. Most people don’t remember their dreams well enough to know if they do it or not.
An example of how to separate an ordinary dream from the extraordinary can be found in my book Dreams 1-2-3: Remember, Interpret, and Live Your Dreams. I used the case of Sugar Ray Robinson’s dream about killing his opponent in the ring. Before his welterweight bout with Jimmy Doyle in 1947, Sugar Ray dreamed that he knocked out Doyle and he subsequently died. Sugar Ray was so unnerved that he tried to back out of the fight. The fight promoter brought in a priest to assure Robinson it was “only a dream.” The rest is history.
Sugar Ray knocked out Doyle in the 8th round. Doyle died that night.
If I was the person brought in to counsel Robinson about his dream I’d begin by asking him if the details matched waking reality. In the dream, was the arena the same as the one he was scheduled to fight in? Were the people nearby, like his trainers and the ref, the same people he anticipated to be at the fight? Discrepancies between waking reality and dream reality are a sign of personal symbolism, though precognitive dreams are known to use symbolism and metaphor, too.
Next I’d explore the possibilities for symbolism. Killing someone in a dream can express personal hostility. Was there bad blood between him and Doyle, so that Robinson felt he “could kill that guy” in the figurative sense? If so, there would be a chance the dream expressed those feelings and was not precognition.
Then I’d explore if a subconscious fear was showing itself in the dream. Fighters die in the ring, rarely but it happens. Sugar Ray had no desire to actually kill someone – he was a great fighter with a vicious punch but was an honorable sportsman. I’d ask him if he feared he could kill Doyle because Doyle had taken too many hard blows to the head.
Some digging through historical accounts of the bout uncovered this possibility. Doyle was known to have head issues. He was a tenacious Irish fighter who publicly proclaimed he was fighting Robinson to earn the money to buy his mother a house. I think it’s possible Sugar Ray’s dream reflected a fear that Doyle should not be boxing anymore, then the fear came true. The dream might not have been precognitive in the strictest sense. Unfortunately, we can’t ask Robinson the questions needed to make that determination.
However, in his autobiography Robinson wrote, “I had knocked out guys before, dozens of them. But in those fights, I always had a good feeling, a conquering feeling when I saw them being counted out, maybe because I could see that they weren’t really hurt. But now, with Doyle stretched out and his eyes blank, I had that empty feeling you get when something in your life is really wrong, and all I could think of was the dream.”
Robinson added, “You warned me, God. You told me. Why did I let everyone talk me out of it.”
I think Robinson’s dream was precognitive, but it’s easier to judge after the fact.
A guy once asked me if a dream he’d had about a plane crash warned him he should not get on a flight he was scheduled to take the next day. I asked him if details from the dream matched waking reality. Was the airplane in the dream from the same airline he had booked? Was it the same type of plane? Were the airport and concourse the same? While precognitive dreams can use symbolism and metaphor, it’s not as likely to be used for details like these.
What I find is, if a dream is precognitive and metaphorical, the entire dream will be metaphor, not just pieces of it. I also asked the guy if something in his recent life could be symbolized as a plane crash. Planes take us to personal destinations. This dream theme often pops up when people are beginning something new and exciting like a romantic relationship or a business venture. The guy said yes, something with his job that he’d had high hopes for recently “crashed” in the figurative sense.
At the risk of being wrong I told him I did not think his dream was precognitive. I watched the news the next day with butterflies in my stomach, and fortunately there were no reports of plane crashes.
A piece of evidence used to support the existence of precognition comes from the fact that planes and trains that crash tend to have more empty seats than usual. An investigation of train crashes on the U.S. east coast during the 1950s showed that the trains that crashed or derailed had fewer passengers than the same trains on other days. The four passenger planes hijacked on September 11, 2001 had half their usual numbers of passengers.
There are many reports of people who did not take flights that crashed because they had a bad feeling. Sometimes though the reason why people miss those flights appears to be dumb luck. For example, Seth MacFarlane was booked on American Airlines Flight 11 on the morning of September 11, 2001, but he arrived ten minutes late because his travel agent gave him the wrong departure time and he was hungover, so he was running late anyway.
Which brings me around to the best way to tell a precognitive dream from an ordinary one: intuition. It’s a gut feeling. Some people who’ve had precognitive dreams report a buzzing sound during the dreams or a ringing in their ears when they wake up. The dreams have an unusual clarity. There can be a feeling like deja vu that accompanies them. For many people, trusting their gut feelings is a new experience. They don’t trust it and don’t know that precognition is a fact of life.
If you analyze a dream that you suspect is precognitive and it a). is not related to residue from the previous day, b). is not an expression of anxiety, c). does not express a wish, and d). is not personal symbolism, then consider that it’s precognitive. But most of all, trust your gut. The most important thing to remember is precognition is not prophecy. Precognition gives us the ability to act ahead of time, to change the possible outcome. In that way it’s more like a forecast. And forecasts can always change.
Visit my website Dreams 1-2-3.com to learn more about my system of dream interpretation. Or to hear more of my radio interviews, visit my media page.
Further information about precognition:
Researcher Ian Wilson’s theory about precognition. Well-researched and cited.
Essay: An Experiment with Time by J.W. Dunne, a seminal work about dream precognition.
Russ Targ’s TED Talk Not exactly about precognition but psi ability in general.
A dream interpretation: bathroom doors
The theme of bathroom doors comes up frequently in dreams related to privacy. The phrase “having a private moment” refers to using the bathroom. In Japan, public bathrooms are equipped with noisemakers so that you can drop a load and not bother your neighbor. Privacy and bathrooms are closely associated, and in the next dream the symbolism really shows itself:
I start out in a setting I like, a bookstore, office, etc. Then I have to use the bathroom. So I go find it and there’s not a soul in there but me, there’s dozens of amazing stalls, but no doors on them! The bathrooms are so lovely and I long to use one of them but I just can’t fathom the thought of using one of them without a door, in case someone walks in! Sometimes I’ll find a stall that has a door but it’s disgusting…. I’ve had these dreams since I was young.
Open or closed? The dream imagery gives away the meaning
The dreamer herself indicated that she thought the dream was related to privacy. It is a recurring dream theme, indicating an ongoing situation. The part that really gives away the meaning is the difference between the bathroom stalls. When there’s no door on the stall the bathrooms are “lovely.” When the stalls have doors the bathrooms are “disgusting.”
I conversed with the dreamer about the symbolism and she caught on quickly. Here is her reply:
I think the bathroom dreams might have something to do with my home life with my parents. Maybe because I feel like life is great with them but that I have no privacy, and when I do finally get the chance to shut them out and have my own life, it will not be as luxurious.
No shabby, insect-ridden hell hole apartments for this young lady. She prefers the luxury of living with her parents…at a price of not being able to shut them out. The door (or lack of it) on the stall symbolizes being able to shut people out of one’s private life. The same ideas applies to dreams about bathroom doors, not just stall doors. Case solved. Next dream.
Dream Interpretation: Acid thrown in face
The face is the part of the body most closely associated with personal identity. Without a face a person is less identifiable. So when dreams refer to the face it’s often symbolic of something related to a person’s identity. With that in mind, take a look at this dream I interpreted at Reddit (link to original post):
I dreamt that I was walking into a Mcdonalds and it was packed so I decided to leave. As I was leaving these two girls were standing outside and had a water bottle in their hand, they were giggling. I kind of stopped to look at them because I felt like they were up to trouble. Both of them looked at me and one of them said “Hey, come here.” That’s when I started running and they chased me. I somehow climbed a pole and got onto this ledge thing, but I was pretty much trapped. When I looked down they were smiling and giggling, looked at each other, and then looked at me. Then a stranger passed by, he was looking at me and then looked down at them. One of the girls said “Hey!” and as he looked at her she squirted the liquid into his face. He started screaming and holding his face, I saw faint smoke coming from it. He ran away as the girls started laughing. The dream ended with them looking up at me, smiling.
Acid attacks like this really do happen and it’s possible to dream about it as a reflection of something heard about it on the news, but in this case I see symbolism at work. Two parts stick out. One, the attack itself, and two, the girls who do it. My first impression was, “I know that type of girl.” They huddle in little groups and disparage everyone else, making themselves feel better by putting other people down. So my guess was that this person’s character or reputation has been attacked recently, probably by a female or group of females.
To make a long story short, this interpretation hit the nail on the head. This is what the dreamer said in response:
Well my mother and I have never had a good relationship. Putting me down is pretty much her specialty. Two weeks ago we actually got into a really explosive argument because, to put it frankly, I was sick of her shit. We haven’t spoken since but I’m pretty much still completely angry. Usually by now we would’ve gotten over it, but this fight was different. She still talks behind my back to other family members and friend. I honestly can’t even stand to look at her.
I’m not sure why McDonald’s is the initial setting — it might have to do with a connection between cheap food and cheap shots, as in personal attacks — but the rest of the dream is pretty obvious in light of this comment. The dream uses substitute characters because I bet it’s hard for the dreamer to see the situation for what it really is. The dream portrays it almost poetically, but think about if you were the person constantly being attacked by your mom. It would probably be hard to admit to yourself that what she does is the symbolic equivalent of getting acid thrown in your face. Also, it’s not the dreamer but a stranger who gets attacked, yet the stranger is a substitute for the dreamer. Again, it’s to create some distance so that the dreamer can observe the situation and get the message without being too disturbed by the dream content before the dream runs its course.
The part about climbing the pole and getting stuck on a ledge is also a perfect metaphor for the situation the dreamer is in with his mom (and, by the way, with the rest of his family, as they follow her lead and tear into him too). Being up on a pole is a way of saying he is alone in this situation. He is trying to get away from it but can’t. Stuck on a ledge is also a variation of the same idea. It symbolizes being in a precarious situation.
Man, what a mother. Good luck, dreamer. I suggested that he get away from his family. His response: I’m trying.
For more about body symbolism in dreams, see this dream about a leg amputated,
this dream about a callous over the heart,
this dream about earwax,
this dream about false teeth,
and this dream about pulling a hair from a foot.
Two lions can represent two sides of the same coin, expressing an internal power dynamic, but not in this dream.
Dream interpretation: two lions in a dungeon
When interpreting a dream, one of the first steps — if not THE first step — is to gage whether it’s an internal or external dream. Does it speak to something going on inside the dreamer, or outside the dreamer? Some dreams describe what is happening inside a person, some describe what’s happening externally in a person’s life. The difference isn’t always apparent at first, and there can be overlap, but it’s a great place to begin because the approaches to interpreting external and internal dreams are a little different, and knowing the difference narrows down the possibilities.
The dream I’m about to discuss looks like an internal dream at first glance because the imagery does not seem to be related to anything going on externally in the dreamer’s life. External dreams often have settings and characters from external life. If you dream about work or school, work or school will be the setting and it will be populated with characters from those areas of life. However, when a dream needs to express something that’s difficult for the dreamer to wrestle with or “see”, it will disguise the waking-life source. With that in mind, take a look (link to original post at Reddit):
I was having a normal dream with nothing weird when all of a sudden it stopped and I was in a dark dungeon with iron gates all around each side, each with a staircase leading up and out of there.
At the nearest staircase a lion fell down and hit the gate he was behind. He was terrified. He took a glance back up the stair then carefully climbed through the gate into the dungeon and stared at the far side of the dungeon.
There was a huge intricate gate in front of a grand staircase. The gate had the image of a lion’s left profile. The eye was hollow and dripping water as if it were crying. Slowly, the image of the lion started to speak, “I am blind in this eye, so I cannot see you” the image turned its face toward the real lion, revealing its second eye, “But with this eye, I can see right through you!”
The huge gate swung open and the real lion ran as fast as it could up the staircase.
Then my normal dreams returned as if nothing had happened except I was blind in my right eye.
The first detail from the dream that sticks out at me is the dichotomy of the two lions, one terrified, the other sort of omniscient. Pairings like this in a dream can be a way of expressing archetypal symbolism. Archetypes are powerful centers within the deep psyche that shape human energy, made up of a “positive side” and a “negative side.” Think of positive and negative as polarity like you get with protons and electrons. It’s an esoteric subject that I won’t get into now, point is that archetypes are solely internal for a dreamer. In dreams, the presence of archetypes is a dead giveaway that the dream is describing an internal power dynamic. Even though one of the lions is made of iron and the other of flesh, they can still be looked it as a pairing.
But not so fast, cowboy. I suggested to the dreamer that she look for internal power dynamics in the dream by examining the lions and looking for ways she related to them. What I suspected was two sides of the dreamer — one timid (negative) and the other assertive (positive) — were in conflict. Dynamic conflict is the essence of personal change and transformation. I had a hunch the dreamer was trying to change something about herself, perhaps trying to become less passive and more assertive.
Her response was lukewarm so I focused next on astrological symbolism in the lions. Dreams can create symbols for pe0ple based off their astrological signs, and Leo is the lion. Leos come into two basic flavors, one overtly aggressive, the other passive-aggressive. It’s like the difference between Mufasa and Scar in The Lion King movie. The dreamer replied that her husband is a Leo and she is a Capricorn. I wondered whether her husband didn’t really “see” her on the one hand, and saw right through her on the other. It could tie together the symbolism between two distinctive details of the dream. The dreamer didn’t make a connection so I moved on to the setting.
This is really where I should have begun hunting for the meaning of the dream. A dungeon is a helluva setting and the symbolism is very telling. It implies that the dreamer feels trapped in a situation. I wondered whether her husband the Leo had her trapped in an abusive relationship or something. In my system of dream interpretation, settings are one of the keys to analyzing a dream. So I suggested to the dreamer that the dungeon could symbolize that she feels trapped. Question was, by what? Relationships can be entrapping, but so can work situations, school situations, personal situations. With that one suggestion, the dreamer made a powerful connection. In her words:
I do feel trapped in my job -
And now that I think about it, I’m wondering if the iron lion represents corporate and higher management. The ones who make the decisions. The don’t see me, they see employee #538. The tears could be crocodile tears, from when they send memos down to us to say, “We ‘care’ about you, now work harder!”
I’m suddenly seeing a ton of ways this connects to how I feel about my job. The natural lion had no choice but to run up the iron lion’s stairs. The iron lion had control and knew it and it will bring the natural lion right back down to the dungeon again.
Maybe it wasn’t that the natural lion looked fearfully up the stairs he first fell down – maybe he was just longing to go back up the stairs but knew he couldn’t. He had to bow to the iron lion’s will before he moved on.
Corporate has been real shitty to us on the lowest rungs on the ladder here lately. Everything is our faults and they claim they want to just fire everyone and start over.
Wow. I guess my mind really wanted me to take a good look at where I was in life.
Wow indeed. What a way for a dream to express what’s going on in the dreamer’s work life! The dream is not about internal power dynamics of the dreamer, but external power dynamics at work.
Back story: This person (20/f) had this dream while working 60-hour weeks travelling across the U.S. in a van as part of a disaster relief program. Click the back story link to see the original post at Reddit (edited for brevity and clarity):
I walk around a house with my volunteer team … and find hidden doors. I walk through them, then keep going down hallways to the next door. Eventually I come across my boyfriend and we get into this huge fight. I look at his phone and he has been texting other girls, sexting with them and going out partying with this guy I can’t stand, which is out of his normal behavior.
Then I am in a car with him, crying and arguing, asking why he keeps defending that person to me and why he would be messaging other girls. He says I’m self-righteous and how dare I judge anyone. Then I ran out of the car and into this room surrounded by mirrors. My hair is messy and makeup runs down my face from crying. I am insanely skinny and as I look in the mirror I keep losing weight. Then I reach up because one of my teeth feels weird, as if it is falling out. I walk closer to the mirror and see the one of my teeth is turning black. Right as I barely touch it, it falls into my hand and my mouth starts bleeding.
I start feeling anxious and cry again. Then my mom walks up behind me and looks at me through the mirror, repeating, “We’ll will fix this, everything is going to be okay.” But I don’t feel okay, I am scared and hurt and can’t get out of the room of mirrors.
Finding hidden or secret rooms can be a dream’s way of saying it’s exploring things hidden from you, making discoveries. The person who had this dream is finding out new things about herself as she is challenged by her job and the lengthy time away from her boyfriend. She is worried and it shows in her dream.
The behavior of her boyfriend dream character is a projection of her feelings. It has nothing to do with her boyfriend per se, and everything to do with her fears about what could happen since she can’t be around to give him the attention he wants and keep an eye on him. When dream characters act out of character from the person you know it’s a sign of symbolism. The image of her boyfriend is merely playing a role scripted for him by the dream story. Her mind is filling in gaps with her worst fears by showing him sexting with other girls and hanging out with people she doesn’t like because they’re bad influences.
The dream dramatizes the situation to make her aware of how she really feels. Next it shows her the source of her fears in her insecurity. Mirrors are used to help us groom and see our appearance. They have a variety of symbolic uses based on those functions. In this dream, being surrounded by mirrors says to me that the dreamer is concerned about her appearance. The dream portrays her disheveled feelings as a disheveled appearance, hair messed up, makeup running down her face.
The source of her fears go deeper, as illustrated by the mirrors showing her to be “insanely skinny” and still losing weight. This ties in with an eating disorder. Some people with eating disorders can never be skinny enough to be satisfied so they waste away in pursuit of an unhealthy image.
The presence of the dreamer’s mother points toward a solution. The dreamer told me that her mother helped get her life back on track and pushed to get her into the disaster relief program. Her mother is a woman the dreamer knows who has a healthy self-image. The dreamer can learn from her how to overcome her anxieties and insecurities.
Anxiety dreams are common. Some traditions even go as far as to claim that all dreams are the result of anxieties. I wouldn’t go that far, but I do think that anxieties show up often in dreams and by understanding the symbolism the dreams can be used for personal growth and healing.
Dream about leg amputated voluntarily – What does it mean?
Dreams use parts of the body as symbolism, and lately legs have been mentioned in dreams shared at Reddit Dreams where I’m a moderator. Take this one for example (original post at Reddit):
In the dream I am planning on having my leg amputated.
The guy goes on to say he is overweight and has a history of diabetes. He’s taking two college classes and failing one of them — anatomy — that he needs to get through nursing school. On top of that, he’s considering a change of schools and it will mean his wife supports them till he graduates and gets a job.
In this dream, leg amputation is symbolism.
Those details give me a few directions to go in. Is it a health warning dream, a way of saying if the dreamer continues on his present course, overweight and diabetic, he might as well cut off his leg? Untreated diabetes can lead to amputations, and the fear of it could be in the back of his mind. Is it a warning to not put too much burden on his wife, who will have to carry the load, or a way saying “legs cut out from beneath you?” That’s getting warmer.
To figure out the meaning of the dream, ask yourself what legs do. Legs take us places. They make us move, and in dreams movement is often connected with movement in a person’s life. Through our conversation on Reddit I found out the dreamer planned to drop his anatomy class that day. In a way, he’s cutting one of his legs off. It’s a setback that will hamper his ability to move his life forward.
The part of the dream that stood out to me is he voluntarily decides to amputate his leg. It’s something that would usually jar a person back to reality, but when it’s dream symbolism we tend to play along because we know subconsciously things are not what they appear.
The dreamer agreed with the interpretation and added that in the class he was dropping, he had a test that day on, of all subjects, leg anatomy.
In another dream with leg symbolism, the dreamer is with two friends driving Lamborghinis. One friend decides to take it to the next level and long board. He crashes and badly wounds his leg. He acts like it’s no big deal, happens all the time. At the hospital he cuts off pieces of his leg, puts them in bags of popcorn and passes them around.
Sounds like some crazy shit, but it’s all understandable as symbolism. Driving around in overcharged sports cars can be a way of symbolizing that the dreamer and his friends are daredevils always seeking the next adventure. The friend who injures himself takes it too far, from the dreamer’s perspective. I used an example of someone who takes mad amounts of pills and pretends like it’s all good. It’s not, but you pretend. The guy who had the dream said it wasn’t pills but something similar.
Another clue is in how the friend passes around pieces of his leg. It’s a way of saying he shares his misery or bad habits. Knowing that the dreamer is in high school and remembering what my friends and I were like at that age, I could picture the scene. Turns out I hit the interpretation on the head.
Twin tornadoes form a heart shape
Dream interpretation: two tornadoes, one author
Oftentimes, violent or scary imagery in dreams is symbolism for something a lot less violent or scary in real life. Remembering that dreams exaggerate so that they are memorable and get your attention, take a look at this dream [link to original post] and see if you can guess what it means. The dreamer is an author who writes novels about zombies and apocalypse:
In my dream, I was driving next to my grandfather, who is long dead now. We saw two tornadoes forming. I told my grandfather we need to get out of here. He told me to let nature run its course. So, we were driving. I pulled out my phone and called my dad. He told me there had been another outbreak. Of zombies.
Boom. Suddenly, I was at some store with my uncle and aunt. He was arrested for theft, even though I know he didn’t do it. Then, the officer walked up to my aunt and told her that he was innocent. I step outside. Huge tornado right in front of my face. I started to run. And run. And I didn’t stop running. All of the people in that store were killed.
I saw a person driving away from zombies. I started yelling at them to stop. “What the hell?!? You are going to let me die?” I screamed. I started to run, but was teleported to my bed, in my house. All of the people from my dream appeared in front of me. I started to tell them all my secrets. Part of my wall blew off and zombies ran into the house. Everyone was sucked in or eaten.
The dreamer is driving, which can symbolize movement in his life. We are said to “go places” in our lives when things are humming along, or get “stuck in place” when our lives are stuck. What better way to symbolize those ideas than with driving a car? It can also symbolize movement (or lack of it) in a particularly area of life. So immediately I think to myself that this dream might be about something the dreamer is trying to accomplish.
Next we get into the zombie imagery. That’s a clue that zombies are somehow involved with the subject of the dream. Zombies in dreams can symbolize the “walking dead” and that imagery fits many situations in life. I’ve interpreted several dreams about zombies that related back to the dreamers’ perceptions that they live in a world of the “walking dead,” or that they themselves fit into this category of being alive but dead inside. But in this dream the zombies are related to something the dreamer is trying to accomplish, as you will see in a moment.
Now consider the tornadoes. By itself a tornado in a dream has a variety of possible interpretations. It can describe something going on in your life that’s comparable to a whirlwind. Frantically getting ready for the holidays is a situation I’ve heard described as a “whirlwind” of activity. A tornado can also describe an inner state of being that is stormy, or a relationship that is tumultuous. There are other possibilities related to anything that goes round and round. This dream gives a big clue to the meaning of the symbolism being used by showing two tornadoes.
So here is my initial response to the person who had the dream:
The part that might connect this dream with your life is the dual tornadoes. I wondered if maybe you have two projects going furiously at once, or two areas of your life that are very active, something like that. In which case your grandpa’s advice to let nature run its course could apply to something you’re working on right now. Judging by the presence of the zombies, maybe you’re working on a new book or two? If so, maybe the part about being left behind expresses the feeling that you want to abandon one of the projects?
Which is exactly the case, judging by the person’s reply:
Wow, basically everything you said was true. I am working on two different books, and was considering [stopping] one of them. Thanks.
To make sure the interpretation is correct, I asked about the dreamer’s grandfather. His presence in the dream is another clue to the meaning. I guessed he was the type of guy to never start something unless he intended to finish it, and it turns out to be the case. One of the books, the author said, was not getting his fullest effort, a sign that it might be better to “let nature run its course” and abandon the effort. I could practically hear Grandpa saying, “If you’re going to do something, you better do it right,” and “finish what you start.”
The author, knowing his heart isn’t into writing one of the books, is told by this dream it’s better to drop one of the projects so he can put his fullest effort into the other one. He’s having difficulty though because he believes in finishing what he starts, as symbolized in the scene when a character drives away, leaving behind the dreamer to presumably get mauled by zombies. The dreamer’s strong reaction (“you’re going to let me die?!”) expresses his feelings about abandoning one of the projects, speaking from the perspective of his creative idea. He has to allow one of the projects to die. I think the dream is telling him that it’s wise, and showing him why he hasn’t done it already.
For more dream interpretations, visit RedditDreams.com. I’m RadOwl.
To learn more about my groundbreaking book about dreams, visits dreams1-2-3.com.
Don’t worry Barbie, it’s only a dream
What does it mean to dream that your partner shrinks while having sex? In the dreamer’s own words:
I had a dream last night where I had sex with this super hot chick. However, halfway through she starts shrinking tinier and tinier until it’s like I’m mashing my dick into the mouth of a Barbie doll.
This doesn’t happen all the time, but it’s happened more than once. Any ideas what this could mean?
My first guess, which you’ll see here if you follow RadOw’s comments, is that the dreamer is enjoying sex less. The action of shrinking while having sex implies that something is diminishing. Since sex is the main action in the dream, you see why I made that connection.
Here is the dreamer’s reply:
I think you hit the nail on the head. My wife has gained weight over this past year and she’s now at her heaviest she’s ever been. Although I love having sex with her, her weight gain has required me to be the more physical one, and I guess in some selfish way I view having sex as being more “work” than it used to be. I wish I didn’t feel that way, but I think it affects how often I initiate sex.
So not only is the dreamer enjoying sex less, he’s having less sex. The issue behind the dream is his wife’s weight gain and how it affects their sex life, so while she’s growing their sex life is shrinking, both in quality and quantity.
Now THAT is what I call some wicked dream symbolism. Having the issue graphically portrayed by this dream helps the guy admit to himself something that’s hard to admit. By doing so he can resolve the issue behind it. As I told him, his wife is the woman he loves no matter what she weighs.
The dreams we call nightmares are often terrifying, violent, morbid, and can leave us feeling like our minds have turned against us. But the imagery is all symbolic, and it’s all trying to help us understand something important happening in our lives.
The next dream shows what I mean. The dreamer had recently decided to stop self-harming (cutting himself), and in response he had a dream that showed him the source of the issue behind the self-harming, his present conditions, and where he could find help:
I dream that I am at my university except the buildings are rundown and abandoned. There are construction hats lying around like someone had been trying to fix up the place. I am called over to a canteen area and I find my granny there along with a shadowy figure that reminds me of my dad who I haven’t seen or talked to in many years.
We eat together and they ask me the standard dinner table questions about my life, and I suddenly feel a sharp pain in my left breast. When they aren’t paying attention I look down my shirt and see a hard patch of skin on my chest — a rock hard lump about the size of a lychee berry shooting pain all through my chest. Suddenly the tool I use for self-harming is gripped in my hand and with relief I slice into the lump and remove it with my fingers, all the while making sure I’m not seen by my relatives.
I’m holding this terrible cystic lump in my hand and feel like I want to just scream. I excuse myself to run to the bathroom and get rid of the cyst, but there’s no sink, no toilet. Voices approach and I’m afraid to be found with the cyst, so I eat it.
Turns out the construction workers had returned. I rejoin my granny and the father-type figure and they’ve finished the meal and are laying down to sleep in sleeping bags. When I think they are asleep I check my chest and see a huge gash. I try to pinch the edges together. Suddenly I hear my granny and look up to see her standing in front of me but it’s not really her, it’s some evil creepy thing with her voice. She says, “So, you’re still doing THAT. Huh. Hardly surprising.” I then wake up freaked out.
What a nightmare, eh? So what message is it telling the dreamer?
Begin with the setting, the dreamer’s university with construction going on, symbolized by the construction hats laying around. It’s a sign that the dreamer is making changes in his life. He has decided to stop harming himself.
Next look at the characters. The dreamer’s granny is present, and so is his absent father. The granny is there because her love helped him decide to stop self-harming, and the father is in the scene because the dreamer harms himself in response to his father’s absence, I’d guess.
In the next scene he is asked typical questions about his life that make him feel uneasy. After all, someone who is secretly self-harming doesn’t want to be scrutinized.
Now we look at the symbols and symbolism. The dreamer notices a hard patch over his left breast. To me it looks like a callous over his heart. It’s a way of saying that he’s become numb to his feelings. By removing it he’s saying that he wants to feel again, but he’s going to go through some growing pains. By eating it he is dealing with the consequences of years of self harm. He can’t run from what he’s done to himself, he has to go through the slow and painful process of coming to terms with himself.
Next consider the symbolism of a lychee berry. This comes from the dreamer’s associations — he says the cyst-thing is the same size as a berry. I wonder if it’s the same color, too, because lychee berries are red like a heart. Spontaneous associations like the dreamer comparing the cyst to a lychee berry are a way of figuring out what dream symbolism means. The gash over the dreamer’s chest that’s left after he removes the cyst is also symbolism for a wounded heart.
The final scene with granny turning into some possessed, evil thing is an expression of the dreamer’s fears, it has nothing to do with how she feels. It expresses fear that he will disappoint her. The dreamer has made a major, beneficial change, and the driving force behind it is granny’s love. Her love for her grandson is helping him to bridge a gap and end a bad cycle of behavior.
When understood as symbolism, this nightmare about self-harming makes sense!
Meaning of a car accident dream
This is a gem of a dream for showing dream symbolism in action, excerpted from the original post at Reddit Dreams:
Howdy! I had an interesting dream and was wondering if y’all had any clue as to the meaning. …The road I was going down [in my car] had a major slope. I had both feet out on the side of the road as my brakes. At some point I just decided to stop doing that and let myself go. I went down this slope faster and faster when all of a sudden I hit something. The sound I heard was the sound of a plastic bin scraping the street. Things froze for a bit and in my head popped out a news headlines about a semi truck hitting several cars before flashing back to the main scene of the dream. I looked down and saw my left foot was gone up the ankle.
To understand this dream begin with the symbolism of driving and a steep slope. Driving in dreams is frequently associated with movement in your life, the road of life you are on, where you are going, where you have been.
A slope can symbolize going downhill in the figurative sense, or loss of control, a situation that gains momentum. The action of going faster and faster in the dream suggests something gaining speed.
Crashing into something, like in this dream, can symbolize “bumps in the road” and hardships. The accident isn’t traumatic, but there is a sacrifice: the dreamer’s lower left leg. Legs and feet are also associated with making your life move, so losing part of a leg could describe a situation that required a sacrifice to the dreamer’s life’s forward movement in order to slow it down.
Which is the case. The dreamer quit a coaching job that was “getting out of control. Things were getting faster and faster with little order until I just couldn’t take it anymore.”
Once you know what to look for, you can easily see that story played out in this dream.